Saturday, November 27, 2010

November 27--my back

Well, it has been 20 years of lifting a wheelchair in and out of car trunks but now lifting a 100 lb woman on and off toilet seats is doing quite the final job on my lower back.  Chronic pain started for me about 2 years ago....this could be really bad down the road.  But I cannot worry about that right now.

This morning was not as good as yesterday morning--she needed help with everything again.  And then she surprised me by calling in a prescription to the pharmacy herself.  That was good!

I am trying to "stay in the moment" as so many dear friends have told me to.  "Be with her, stay in the present and listen to her voice" is something I was told.  I'm trying--it is hard.  I'm depressed of course--who wouldn't be.  But I'm trying nonetheless.  Mom has that depressed look on her face about 90% of the time now.  She has never had that before...I think this is significant to where things are and where they will be going.

Today I need to go to the stores for groceries, a few supplies for her bathroom and whatnot.  I have no help at home yet, no one to stay with her when I'm out.  She SHOULD be alright because she always has been in the past.  I will spread the trips out over the course of the day so she isn't alone for too long at any one period of time.

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